RiO

geewhizz_rio @ 2005-08-25T21:38:00

2005-08-26T02:41:54Z

this song tells it all.

im finding my wisdom and patience again.

i need time...
---------------------------

On Fire
-Switchfoot

Tell you where you need to go
Tell you when you'll need to leave
Tell you what you need to know
Tell you who you need to be

But everything inside you knows
Says more than what you've heard
So much more than empty conversations
Filled with empty words

And you're on fire
When He's near you
You're on fire
When He speaks
You're on fire
Burning at these mysteries

Give me one more time around
Give me one more chance to see
Give me everything You are
Give me one more chance to be... (near You)

Cause everything inside looks like
Everything I hate
You are the hope I have for change
You are the only chance I'll take

When I'm on fire
When You're near me
I'm on fire
When You speak
And I'm on fire
Burning at these mysteries
these mysteries...

I'm standing on the edge of me (x3)
I'm standing on the edge

And I'm on fire
When You're near you
I'm on fire
When You speak
(Yea) I'm on fire
Burning at these mysteries...

oOh yesss...

2003-01-28T23:00:35Z

TERRIFIC tuesdays are the best=). hehe. i had a lot of sleep last nite...so yeaaah it was niiice...then woke up early...got to skool hellah early too...yay, im soo good! ^_^ plus, my classes were a real breeze (despite two tests..which i studied super duper hard for)..AND..dundundun..

i got my acceptance letter to UT Austin school of nursing! woohooo!! im soo happy. its a huge weight lifted off my shoulders=). sooOo yess..austin here i come...>.<

oOok and top it all off, im sittin here savoring my wendys frosty with fries! yUmyum in my tumm tumm=P. hehe...want some??

alrightz..i'll update this shindig laters...take care buddies

so much on my mind....stressed

2002-12-14T00:29:32Z

okaaay its been awhile since ive done the livejournal thingie..yesyes..school has been keepin me busy=/. argh! sall good i guess. ):

neways...a few minor things givin me a headache:

1. skOol! tests, tests, tests
2. i want WHITE xmas lights on my tree dayamnit! i dont like the multicolored ones=/. and yes...things WILL go my way..somehow...*sigh* (sounds funnie huh? i knoe...but im quite weird ryte now)
3. college applications...still working on it...ahhh!
4. xmas shopping. what in the world am i gonna buy? >.<
5. my missing piece project for english...which i gotta do this weekend. whats my missing piece? spirituality. theres soo many things that tie into that topic. hopefully my project is gonna be badazz=P

thats it for now. enough venting for me...take care budz...

PS: happy 17th bday neha! yippee!

wooHoo 18!

2002-11-09T08:26:52Z

yay! i turned 18 on da 7th=). whOopie!

friday nite i celebrated w/my buddies. ate out..watched 8 mile. coolio stuff. THANKS SOOOO MUCH guys...I LOVE YOU ALL! ^_^

dannnng...i got kickazz friends=). *siiiigh*

something to ponder...

2002-11-01T21:40:24Z

Look..if you had..one shot, or one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted..in one moment
Would you capture it..or just let it slip?
---lose yourself, eminem

BAM! ive heard eminem's niiiice niiiice song sooo many times...but ive never really listened to it. ive never absorbed it..never really taken it in...you feel me? well im sitting here in webmastering class with my homie g's yeehaw neha, alfie, liz n kelly with nutthin really to do..so i decided to hit up the net..looked up lyrics...and yeah 'lose yourself' juss kinda hit me...it forced me to ESCAPE for juss a moment and enter that weird, confusing realm of mine. oH dear...when i get into my own lil world..nutthin else matters to me. @>.<@ its like a traffic of endless thoughts...ones that are silly, crazy, intense, or helllah confusing. but neways..i started to ponder...

...theres this one BIG opportunity right in my pathway thats coming up. to the seniors..you knoe what it is...*sigh*..dundundun..COLLEGE! sounds scurry huh? well..yeah it is scurry..but in a way, its not. for the a little over a year, ive been 'detached' from a part of myself. the part of me that actually dreamt tirelessly of my college future. freshman and sophomore year i continously read college info books (particularly TIME and U.S. News..haha..im a n.e.r.d...i know). i also wrote out detailed plans of what classes i would take or what majors/minors i was interested in. basically...i was on my way to being a totally prepared college student. HA! funny how things can change so quickly. junior year i slacked off a bit...not a good idea..yeayea...my mind says, "hey! rios got an excuse for slackin off! she was..umm..having her fun!..and PLUS, she had a few issues.." but then again my heart knows that all the slacking off i did was entirely my fault! i was simply ignorant...i didnt care as much as i did in the past years...and all my "issues" i was goin thru..was not worth tossing away my junior yr.

geez...and finally..senior yr creeps along...and KLONK (yes, i like sound effects..hehe)...its about that college time. thoughts clutter my mind..."where am i gonna go? what am i gonna be? wat about SATs?"..ahhh! amidst all the stress, chaos, and pandemonium is my ONE opportunity. this opportunity is one thing i cannot mess up. there's no slacking off here. i cannot even risk making an asinine mistake.

here is my opportunity, my one shot...to make a fraction of my dreams into reality. i want to go to UT Austin, major in nursing/biology, and minor in business or journalism. after graduating college, i want to work as a nurse practitioner...earn my money..then go back to med school to become a doctor.

seems like a big dream ryte? well it is. but this is something im going to hold onto..and not let slip away.

=)

...im weird...

2002-10-31T20:09:19Z

once again...more ralph wiggum quotes..hahaha

Ralph Wiggum: "when the doctor said I didn't have worms any more, that was the happiest day of my life."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
RALPH: Daddy, these rubber pants are hot
CHIEF WIGGUM: You wear 'em till you learn son

geeh...for some reason...my day seems a lil brighter=)

teehehe

2002-10-24T19:05:08Z

that lil kid Ralph from the simpsons:
"Mrs. Krabappel and Principal Skinner were in the closet making babies and I saw one of the babies and the baby looked at me."

moohaha...geeh...lol...i knoe weird things crack me ups..but hey, when you're in skool..one needs sum humor ya know?...=)

...everything changes...but BEAUTY remains...

2002-09-04T12:21:22Z

reflections: everyday there are lil and big changes in our lives. and sumtimes these changes are for the better you know? i've realized i cannot solve every friggen thing in the world...but i do what i can...i try and try...and in the end, i dont feel failure, i dont feel regret...i juss feel like i gave it my all...

..i'll write more laters...gbye my buddies=)

..juss ONE more week=)

2002-08-05T04:51:49Z

mayan o mayan..what a week! i spent a week in NYC to visit relatives that i havent seen in a looong time=P. shoooot...mayaaan..my guy cuzzinz be hardcore NY ballerz...haha..i wasnt even gonna TRY playin against them. but yeah..NYC was memorable...cuz i got to see all the places i never thought i would ever get to see..ex: ground zero, time square, chinatown, MTV studios! haha..yea it was very cool sightseeing! and omg..the eateries i went to were sooo yUmmy...*cappuncino flavored italian ice*...mMmm. hehe...and i also did a bunch of swimmin and tanning in NY..haha..im tryin to get darker..and in my attempt to, i ended up with bad tan lines, burn marks, and skin thats peeling..*yuuuck*!

now im bakk in VA juss chillen...i miss my cuzinz in NY dearly...they sooo nice..haha...our last nite there we drank in chinatown...hehe...u probably thinkin, "what riO drinkin?" hahaha..yesyes...i got buzzed...but it was juss fiiine cuz i was having fuuuun with my cuzzinz=). but afterwards i needed to PEEEE soo bad...then i fell asleep on da couch...haha ^_^

sooo what am i gonna do with my last week? go shopping of course...VA/D.C. has oOohsoo grreeeat malls=)..yay!

okies imma go baaai now..i MISS everyone in dallas! ahhhh...i cannot wait to get bakk home to see yall..*sigh* take care guys! mahal kita=)

all about the family

2002-07-15T04:32:54Z

woaah nelly...sunday was, well...to put it easily, PEACEFUL. i went to church around 1ish..then afterwards i went to the mall with my older bro to pick up my check and shop a lil bit. =) it was fun fosho...cuz i dont get to spend that much time with my bro cuz he ish in college and stuff...and he comes to visit like every 2 months...if we're lucky.

then i came home..and took a loooong azz nap...zZZzZz..it was sooo calming n relaxing...*siiiigh* naps are the greatest=P. laters on..rach called asking me if i wanted to go to benniganz...but i decided not to cuz i was gonna spend the rest of the day with my family. we had dinner together n ish...so it was kOolioz. oOooh yeah..me and my bro had a jam session in my room...haha...yesssh, we were singing to john mayer n howie day...haha..he's gettin me into all these different musicians...ahhh...craziness=)....but hey, i still like my slo jams and bOoOotay music!

okies..now im chillen at home...sorta tired. this week is gonna be awesome..cuz skool ends on thursday...and i dont have work nemore for a month!!! woOohOoo! omg...im happy...i get to chill after skOolioz=). plus next tuesday i leave for NYC and VA!!!...heck yeah! hahaha. LIFE IS GOOD=).

gnite my buddies. love you...

skipping...

2002-07-09T06:51:32Z

heeeey gyrlz and guys! teehehe...welpz today i came into my 1st class 20 min late...yeah, cuz i didnt get ANY sleep last nite...none whatsoever...omg...it was craziness...

me babes and i planned on going to starbux for gyrl talk...but guess what? riHo has a 2nd class...arrrrgh. so what did i decide to do? SKIP it..haha...ive missed like a few hours already...i figure...why not miss another day? cuz i'd do nething for my babes...especially during this time..when theres 'ish' going on. da problem was...how am i gonna pull it off since da skool calls home if u miss class? hmmm...i had to do a lil lying..yes i know..its not cool..but u gotta do whateverz it takes=/...so i called my daddy after my 1st class that i was supposedly going to work...for a couple of hours...then i would head back home around 3ish...take a break and go back to work at 5...hehehe...maaayan...he was of course worried i would miss class and ish...but everything turned out well! ^_^

sooo..me, ellen, rach, and joyce met up at starbux...talked bout stuff...it was GOOD gyrl talk...=). afterwards me, ellen, n joyce went to da mall to go shoppin...hehe...joyce was "touched" a lil too much by the lancome makeup person...let's call that person "it."...haha..lol...cuz we didnt know if it was a gyrl or guy! all we could see ish a very strange asian person...very unique i must add. by the end of the shoppin experience...me and ellen decide that "it" ish a transvestite....spelling? yuuup...forealz...no kiddin....it was interesting no doubt...hehe.

alrightz...then at 5 i went to work...saw neha and my cuzin mariel n her boo mike. it was all good cuz i got to close n my boss wasnt there....so i had a peaceful time to myself=).

now imma go chitchat...cuz i juss woke from a nice nap...haha...mMmm...gnite my fwends=)

ahhh...oH so full!

2002-06-02T12:05:30Z

geewhizz...ive never eaten sooo much in my life until last nite...haha...my O my.

yesterday was my cuzin's graduation...and i missed the ceremony cuz of dang SATs...but its alrightz..cuz my cuzin still had a load of supporters ^_^.

around 4ish...we made our way to addison @ bayside steak and seafood...oOOoh gosh...that place was SWT! it looked very elegant n huge...and guess who took up about 3/4 of the restarant? haha...the whole family! there was probably close to 60 people at justin's grad thingie. sooOoo much family=). basically...my cuzinz and i ate everything there...haha...jk jk...i didnt go to the hibachi/steak grilling area...i thought i would skip that and juss get the 'normal' stuff...ex. rice, tempura, potatoes, etc. then it was dessert time...can anyone say YAY?!? they had the best dessert...mocha cake...white chocolate strawberries...fudge pie...cheesecake...ahhhh...it was all irresistible. everyone there was having fun...we were all laughing our booOOotays off..hehe..juss acting sillie n goofy. for example, my cuzin rachel made an attachable middle finger with foil for the lil kiddos...haha...lol...omg, i told u we're weird=P. maaan...we stayed there foreverz...haha...we FINALLY left at 9:30...goodness...hehe...every hour there was worth it...cuz i was with my kOOoOOlio n LARGE family.

ryte when i got home i hit the sack...*zZzz*...i was too tired to do nething=/...but maybe sunday i could do sumptin...after all, it's summer! woOOohOoo!

**congrats to the '02 grads esp. my cuz justin!..haha..dood i meant it wen i said ur the coolest! good luck in college and we <3 u! hehe..oh yeah dont forget to watch 'gilbert grape'...lol... **

from worse to BETTER....

2002-05-31T06:05:29Z

alrightz...2nite was juss bizarre...i'll explain>>around umm 9pm elaynne called me as i was writing my NEW livejournal entry...welpz..it was a depressing entry...hehe...basically it was bout how much i missed a certain sum1...*sigh* this is how far i got when elaynne called~>

"4 seasons of loneliness" is one of my fave songs of all-time..the lyrics are sad...but they make you think...they make ME think...

"I long for the warmth of days gone by
When you were mine
But now those days are memories in time
Life’s empty without you by my side
My heart belongs to you
No matter what I try..."

~~i still remember that 1st nite...my gosh i was so scurd...i didnt know what to expect...ya know? the more time i spent with you...the more i began to CARE for you...i knew in my heart u were fragile, somewhat broken...and all i wanted to do was ease the pain. maybe i didnt try enough...maybe i wasnt strong enough for you...iono? each day i hope that i'll have another one of those days...when you were there to make me smile....juss by being by my side.

****end of it*****

ok, so elaynne calls me telling me to go karaoke with her and sum of the guys. it was FREE she said...so of course i wanted to go! yUuup yUuup! then i found out that sum1 *special* was gonna be there=). *smilez* anywayz...elaynne picked me up @t my hizzo...and it was peter driving, elaynne in da passenger seat..and me and justin in da back. hmmm...by this time im still kinda weirded out cuz i was juss like sad 20 min ago...and suddenly that person i was thinking of the whole day was in arm's reach! my golly gosh...it was strange...and yeah i think thats why i was kinda hush hush in da car...haha...lol...he tried to get me to talk..."soooo how are u?" as he nudges my arm=)...ooOooh i was still in my WEIRD state...=/

welps...there were like doods everywhere at starz karaoke ...umm..the only people i remember were babyjohn, steve, and ron. the othas i forgot=/...sorriez! later on that nite mary nevada and 2 of her fwends stopped by=)...i miss mary...me and her used to do english projects together...awww...

around 12:30ish we all drove back home=P...and said goodbyez and hugged...then elaynne went to go talk to my older bro...haha...cuz my kuya wanted me to be home at midnite...oh wells! hehe...he wasn't even mad! he was like, "ok, great ur home." SSSCCCCOOOORE-ness! wooOohOoo!

tomorrow ish bz...i gotta study a lil bit for SATs....then i wanna do lunch with sum of my pals=)....orightz..imma head to bed...lataz and take care my fwends=)

*zZZz*
this is an AWESOME day....

graduation...graduation....

2002-05-30T15:24:12Z

YESSSS! im done with skoOOol! *sigh* what a big azz relief=).

wednesday afternoon i went to the mall with my mom and older bro. we had to pick out new furniture cuz by friday our house is gonna be totally empty...well practically...we're getting rid of our living room furniture and our dining room set. soooo, our NEW dining stuff comes saturday...and the living room stuff comes in next week! scccooooore....haha...i love redecorating! oooOOh yeah, me and my bro were feeling really NICE so we bought our lil bros sum shirts at abercrombie...haha...i swear my lil bros are freakin lucky...cuz they got nice siblings like me! haha...lol.

wednesday nite was of course starbux time. i stopped by there with my cuzinz rachel n regina....but we didnt stay or nething. then i went back home for like 10 min...then went back to starbux again to chill with my peoples=). oOOooh yeah! after that, i got to ride in elaynne's swt prelude!...goodness that car ish sooooo purty...ahhhh i like it lots!=P

and this thursday morning i had to go to my bro richard's 6th grade graduation thingie. it was oKiez i guess...and afterwards everyone went to eat breakfast at chikfila...mMMm...yUmYuM! in about 2 hours i have to go to my lil cuzin Angel's kindergarten graduation...haha..it's gonna be kyOOot!

upcoming stuff:
friday---'fast n furious' event @ lizard lounge...uMmm...not sure if im going cuz i have to study for SATs...but i really wanna go cuz my cuzinz boyfriend's car ish gonna be featured! woOOhOoo!

saturday---SATs in the morning. my cuzin justin's graduation in the afternoon...and his grad party at nite. *woooow*...it's gonna be one BZ weekend=/

stuck in skOool...need i say more?

2002-05-29T14:15:30Z

yeah since i was absent ONE day...i had to go to skoolioz...to take my english and physics test. welps the english test was take home..so i did it monday nite...and the physics test is like open book/open note...so no worries aye?

now im stuck in english class...and i was bored like whooooahdi so i tried for 20 minutes to find AIM on the computer...but ahhh..it took foreverz since everything was "access denied." goooodness...thas alrightz though...cuz i finally found it with chris ngyuen's help! scccooore! and it's kinda early still...so there's only 1 person online...and it's my babe elaynne! yayyyyy ness=)...it's almost here bday guys...so yeah...CELEBRATION...whOoopwhOoop!

okiez im out...almost time for 2nd period....lata

how old do i look? "ummm...17".....dayamn!

2002-05-27T05:35:15Z

woaaahdi...today was juss krazzzie...yeah cuz i was with sum of my scandallaz gyrlz...haha..uhOhuhOh!

sunday afternoon i went to my aunt's babyshower...stayed there for about 4 hours...chillen with the family...eating lyke woooaaah!...haha...it was pretty tyte=)...and then i went back home to rest for a lil bit. *zZz* ooOoh yeah...and i was lying in bed while watching "selena"...my o my, that's like one of my fave movies ever! then around 9ish, me, rach, ellie, and neha went to starbux! wooOohOoo! the bad thing was jesse was working...ahhh...i hate pedophiles=/. we stayed there for awhile juss chit chatting=).

neha was hungry soooo the next stop was bennigans! our waiter joey was the BEST! we asked him how old he thought we were...lol...and yuuup he was a good guesser...hehe...he said neha was 16...and i looked 17...{dayamnnn it i wanted him to say 21!}..he said rach was about 16...and ellen...hehe...well he thought ellie was 15!!!...omg...phunnie=P. benniganz was hellah fun cuz we got to joke around with joey...who turned out to be a kOoOol dood! i told joey that rachel was "the experienced one" in the group...mooohaha...ya knoe it's true! *winks*..jp=P.

after bennigans we played a game of cone snatching...good gosh! putting cones in the middle of the street ish juss fukked up! haha...we made neha do the dirtay work...yah she actually put the cone between the two lanes...haha....see what happens when we get bored? lol...we do phunnie things for amusement=).

newhoo...our last lil stop was at taco bell. we were passing by and we saw a ton of loitering hotties in sexxay cars...so us scandallaz gyrlz parked @ taco bell and yuuup...we were checking out sum kyoooties....hehe...too bad they drove off all of a sudden! it was like that scene from "fast n the furious" where all the cars juss rush out cuz of the cops...yeah those ppl were fast to get outta there...the reason? we dunno=/.

it was gettin pretty late...so we went home=P. maaaan...2nite was definitely semi crazy...haha...hopefully tomorrow will be even MORE crazier...oOOoh heck yeah=).

i LUV my cousins!

2002-05-26T05:37:18Z

OoOohlala...saturday was pretty good ^___^. i spent the day with mostly my coOoOlio cousins=P...which was a good thing cuz i havent had the chance to really chill with them...so yeah it was super dee duper!

around 6ish my brother and i went to northpark to shop...yayness! he was VERY generous...hehe...he got me a light denim skirt at banana republic!..woOOohOoOOo! i was looking for ian but i think he got off work already=/. then we went to gap and i helped my bro pick out a jacket...it was very koOOo=)...he bought the one i told him to buy...haha..isnt it neato when he listens to my fashion advice???...i think so=).

then at 8, my bro and i met up with my cousins rachel {plus her boyfwend jason}, mariel, and justin. they were all at taiwan cafe in richardson chillen...so we juss headed over there. all of us chilled and reminscined about our younger days....and we talked about juss growing up since my cuzin justin is graduating...ahhhh! haha...then the subject of movies came up....my gosh...justin kept acting scenes from corky romano and joe dirt! lol..."ya girls want sum cookies? haha....i swear we probably looked like a bunch of weirdos in that parking lot...haha..cuz maaan, there were lots of people there. =P
oh yeaaah...a bunch of azn doods were checking out jason's ride...every1 kept passing by it and pausing...haha..we kept laughing...but i guess one expects that kinda attention if they have a 2001 yellow prelude with all those mods! foreaaaal, jason has a nice azz car...*sigh*....hehe...what a lucky doood! we all continued to talk for awhile....and it was fun juss spending time with my cousins....it was speshul becuz soon everyone has to part ways cuz of college=/...*sadness*...but it's these kind of gatherings that i cherish most. i loooove my cousins=).

after richardson...we were pretty tired..so we went back home. and now it's midnite and my cuzin justin is supposed to stop by and chill at my house for a lil bit...awessssome...=)

okz...the agenda tomorrow? church, lunch with the family, and my aunt's babyshower! hopefully i'll have time to squeeze in starbux...^____^

zZzzZZZz....

2002-05-25T09:10:04Z

hmMm...friday nite was full of sleep! haha...dayamn...my parents went funiture shopping & ended up coming home with chinese food at like 9:30...but being da sleepy butt that i am, i fell asleep and missed out on da good stuff=/. grrr...i was dressed to go outz too! hehe...i juss wanted to lay in my bed and rest...but arrrrgh those sleep fairies took over! blaaah...oh wells.

saturday i hope to shop with my brother {kuya}=P. it's always good when we shop together becuz he buys me things...moohaha...so looks like rio's going to banana rep...yay!!!! alrightz im back to bed...gonna watch schindler's list...yeah i told my mom to rent it=).

***i miss you...there's not a day that passes that i don't think of the memories, the good times...***

"For You I Will"

When you're feeling lost in the night,
When you feel your world just ain't right
Call on me, I will be waiting
Count on me, I will be there
Anytime the times get too tough,
Anytime your best ain't enough
I'll be the one to make it better,
I'll be there to protect you,
See you through,
I'll be there and there is nothing
I won't do.

I will cross the ocean for you
I will go and bring you the moon
I will be your hero your strength
Anything you need
I will be the sun in your sky
I will light your way for all time
Promise you,
For you I will.

I will shield your heart from the rain
I will let no harm come your way
Oh these arms will be your shelter
No these arms won't let you down,
If there is a mountain to move
I will move that mountain for you
I'm here for you, I'm here forever
I will be your fortress, tall and strong
I'll keep you safe,
I'll stand beside you, right or wrong

I will cross the ocean for you
I will go and bring you the moon (yeah, yeah)
I will be your hero your strength
anything you need (I will be..)
I will be the sun in your sky
I will light your way for all time
Promise you
For you I will

For you I will, lay my life on the line
For you I will fight, oooooh
For you I will die
With every breathe, with all my soul
I'll give my world
I'll give it all
Put your faith in me (put you're faith in me)
And I'll have to leave it be

I will cross the ocean for you (I will cross the ocean for you)
I will go and bring you the moon
Promise you (Promise you)
For you I will, I will, I will, I will,

I will cross the ocean for you
I will go and bring you the moon
I will be your hero your strength
Anything you need, (Anything you need)
I will be the sun in your sky (yeah, yeah)
I will let you wait for all times
Promise you (I promise you)
For you I will (Ooooh)
I promise you
For you I will

give me more sugar baby!...hehe

2002-05-21T22:57:10Z

golly...i got my wish! tuesday was sooo much better than monday! i started off the day pretty supah=). i got to talk to my buddie owais 1st period about the upcoming picnic. we were jokin around with our spanish teacher mr. medina...we asked him if he can be the BBQ guy...but naaah, he said he doesnt knoe how to do that stuff...haha...oh wells. then 2nd period rachel and i took piks with the 'fake' human body...yUp, you knoe how rachel posed with the body...ehem..hehe..i juss hugged the body cuz im not nasty like that...haha...but rach, my o my, she did sumthing else with that body...lol..goodness!

the rest of the day was alrightz...i walked with ellen after skOOolioz and we talked a lil bit about hex. i knoe she misses him lots...so hopefully mr. hex can make her happy by seeing her sumtime!

oh yeah...i wanna say thanx to ellen for staying up till almost 2am last nite giving me advice. hehe...we had a good talk about stuff and dayaaaamn ellen's one wise woman! i was sad last nite and she made me smile...i knoe you'll always be there babe! luv yaz.

okie dokez...i gotta work on my english project thats due tomorrow...ahhh=/. gnite and take care my buddies=)

frustrated with today....

2002-05-21T05:54:08Z

ever have a bad day? a reallllly bad one enough to where you look forward to the next day...juss hoping that everything will be OK? yeah well today was the day where i was about to go krazzie.

2nd period was blahhh...but i wont get into that cuz its juss gonna make me MORE stressed. gradually the day got worse...ahhh...and i wanted to just scream...but i kept it to myself=/. after skool i had a nice talk with joyce on da phone about what ive been going through and ish....she made me feel a lil better. thanx babe i luv you. then i pretty much hung out in my room the rest of the night...either sleeping or watching tv. thank gosh this day is offically over...hopefully tuesday will be better.

to those who knoe my "ish": im trying to juss let it all go...to juss start over and stuff...but it's easier said than done. i knoe how some of you feel about this...and u juss want me to forget that person...cuz they're not worth my time. it's gonna take time for me to let it all go....

"To let go isn't to forget, not think about, or ignore. It doesn't leave feelings of anger, jealousy, or regret. Letting go isn't winning and it isn't losing. It's not about pride and it's not about how you appear, and it's not obsessing or dwelling on the past. Letting go isn't blocking memories or thinking sad thoughts, and doesn't leave emptiness, hurt or sadness. It's not giving in or giving up. Letting go isn't about loss, and it's not defeat. To let go is to cherish memories, but to overcome and to move on. It is having an open mind and confidence in the future. Letting go is accepting. It is learning and experiencing and growing. To let go is to be thankful for the experiences that made you laugh, made you cry and made you grow. It's about all that you have, all that you had and all that you will soon gain. Letting go is having the courage to accept change, and the strength to keep moving. Letting go is growing up. It is realizing that the heart can sometimes be the most potent remedy. To let go is to open a door, and to clear a path and to set yourself free."

can't sleep

2002-05-20T08:44:38Z

my mind is racing with thoughts...just random ones....and i guess you could say im confused...but that doesn't describe entirely everything. so i sit here in da middle of the nite...alone..juss thinking...

"Too far apart to bridge the distance
But something keeps us hanging on and on
Pretending not to know the difference
Denying what we had is gone
Every moment we're together
It's just breaking me down..."

~~~"i don't wanna cry" by mariah carey

krazy mall folks and SNL

2002-05-19T15:40:01Z

saturday i mostly chilled @ home...sleeping! haha...hey i deserve it dont i?

around 7ish i went to pick up my piks at walmart...yeah i only developed one roll cuz the other roll isnt done=/. but the piks turned out pretty good!=) then i went to town east mall with rachel to buy a shirt. i swear that mall is scaring me every time i go there....im beginning to think its like a nest full of potential rapists or molesters....good gosh! kz when i decided on the shirt, i told rachel that we should juss cruise the men's department to see my fwend's babyboo. umm bad idea! when we were walking towards the men's section, i got followed by this dood. okz, i thought he was pretty good lookin...around 25yrs. old, tall, built, dressed GQ ish, etc....but what makes him fugly is his approach! dannng, he asked th usual *pedophile* questions....yah u knoe those questions...welps i left that dood and found rachel laughing her bootay off sumwhere in da racks...lol...she left me hanging! what if i was like kidnapped?!? teehehe...thank GOD i wasnt! after that scenario this group of ghetto folks were hollering too...and rachel was laughing agen...she was like, "is your outfit see through or sumthing rio?" *sigh* i hate pedophiles!

newhoo...later that nite ian called me asking to go to da movies...i miss my Flat Pookie! aww ian GP misses ya=). i couldnt go cuz it was pretty late so i juss watch saturday nite tv shows{havent done that in a loooong azz while}. 1st i watch apollo kids and there was this bro and sister singing lil romeo's song! omg it was supah kyoot...so i juss had to record it! hehe....then SNL came on...and yup...im glad i watched it...cuz they had the best skit! this "couple" was singing peabo bryson's "tonight i celebrate my love for you"! it was hilarious....and yes i taped it! haha...it's sooo freaking funnie=P. so what did i do after that? being da dork that i am, i downloaded the song and laughed my boootay off!

now it's sunday morning...and i think i gotta go to churchie late cuz my cuzin regina has a concert dis afternoon. im xcited! woooHooo! go regina...break a leg gyrlie!

g2g...i'll write more later on=P

one for the most fun days of my life----SERIOUSLY

2002-05-18T21:46:47Z

banquet friday nite can be summed up in two words...absolute fun! i cannot believe how much fun i had...*sigh* it was an unforgettable nite i must say=).

ryte after skool i had to rush home take a shower, dry my hair, etc...then headed over my cousin's hizzo at 5pm cuz she was gonna do my makeup...hehe...dannng, rena ish so good with playing around with all that M.A.C. makeup...thanx rena for squeezing time in ur BZ schedule for me=P. then i went back home and fixed my hair...my o my...i was sooo krazy cuz i had to pack all dis stuff for that nite...haha...my mom helped me out of course...hehe. around 6:30, neha arrived...she also helped me out with my hair...haha...thanx girl! since the banquet started at 7, we left by 6:45....arrived at the Anatole by 7:15. wowerz, that place ish so BEAUTIFUL! when we finally found the "ballroom," people were still standing around cuz they havent opened it up. so...we chilled with my boootayful fwends rach, susie, and caitlin. finally at like 7:30 they we got the "go" signal to enter...woooHoOOo!

once we got there it was time to eat...yUpp, i only ate like a lil bit..haha...not that much cuz it was mostly vege food...and everyone knoes rio doesnt eat salad=/. welpz after that we got to the dessert table! SCCCCOOORE! they had the best dessert...it was overwhelming...hehe...mMMmm chocolate mousse. finally my babe ELLEN arrived...looking scandallaz in her 2 piece dress...hehe...and then my otha babe JOYCE got there with her buddies...then ELAYNNE got there with her boo peter...hehe...my babes looooked fabulous! of course other people came....like mikey, babyjohn, lil ellen, justin, n lil peter. maaan when everyone was together we took like millions of pics...yay!

next part? shaking that AZZ! yuuup, we danced soooo much i was getting freaking hot so i had to cool off with water every now and then. daaaang, i swear me and my gyrls can shake our boooOotays lyke woaaah! ellen was gettin down n scandallaz...and so was sophie! and guess who has it on tape? MEEEE! haha...yup i got it on tape baby! i'll admit i was getting freaky...hehe...and one part me and neha were freaking on _________ {will not say name, cuz u probably knoe who it was} and there was like a circle gathered around us..haha...people must of thought we were wild!

while i was on da dancefloor weird danny kept buggin for my number...sorry dood, no can do...that number isnt available unless i LOVE you...hehe. more dancing ensued....i was having a blast! i love dancing...especially the mMMm so good up n close dancing...lol...yah thats the way i like it...jk! mostly i danced to da upbeat songs...and i only danced to 2 slow songs=). *sigh*...memorable=).

when it hit 11, the partay was over! i didnt want it to end....but oh wells. everyone in our group went to change clothes...that took like a lil awhile...and once we were settled, we went to star karoake. it was me, ellen, elaynne, rach, neha, babyjohn, peter, justin, lil peter, and mikey. oOOoh maaan, we had fun...hehe..i liked when we sang "summer nites" becuz it was guys vs. gyrls...yUUup so kyoot! and the last song the guys sang was "now and forever"...such a swt song...*sniffs.* it was late, so we went home. i stayed da nite at neha's hizzo...and we were gonna watch a movie...but we tired out...haha...and yeah there was a funny incident at her hizzo...rio slips on the stairs...and her boootay goes bump, bump, bump...lol...haha....neha was laughing...omg, so sillie!

overall, the nite couldnt have been better. i was with the people i LOVE...and that made it all the more special. thanks guys for making banquet sooo fun=). now all i gotta do ish wait for those pics to develop...teehehe...yessss!

rio ish one happy person! great isn't it?

no more drama, no more pain....

2002-05-15T00:34:20Z

well, banquet is coming up real soon...and you think that everyone is totally psyched about it...but not really. sometimes issues get in da way...and we tend to dwell on it so much that it practically absorbs us for the moment. and when one of my babez is going thru ish...i, too, feel that sadness.

to my budz (particularly one that is going thru "ann" ish):

we go through probz that bring us down, make us cry, and weaken our hearts. but what makes the obstacle or issue easier to overcome is when we go through it with our friends. when it seems like there's no escape from dis pain....we ALWAYS have each other to lean on. no matter what we'll back each otha up. you have been there for me when i was in need...and i cannot express in words how grateful i am. thank you and i love you.
my friend has always told me, "in the end it will be OK." i believe it becuz i knoe in her heart she believes it too.
<<<>>>>>
.."like a bridge over troubled water...you stood beside me, beside me...and your love did not falter. and then the angel, angel in you, gave me the strength to know that i will get through. and that's how i survived, there's no other reason....and now i know i'll make it through the miracle of you..."
<<<>>>>
to my closest buddies....mahal kita ^____^

oH so happy

2002-05-14T07:32:29Z

hmMm...i just woke up from a sweet nap. so my house ish really quiet ryte now...since it's 2am=/. welps, lets see whats going on in rioz brain...hehe....

why am i WAITING? why am i holding back? why am i pushing away other guys? i guess becuz someone already touched my heart...and i don't wanna let that person go...letting them go isn't worth it. i want that person in MY life....as long as they exist in my world then i feel somewhat happy. there's not a day that passes when i don't think of that person. it's the little things that remind me of them. *sigh* im not gonna lie. i MISS that person lots.

..."you were once in a lifetime. a treasure near impossible to find. i've never seen nething as BEAUTIFUL as you..."

*sniffs* where's da tissues?!? =/

RiO